✦ JUPITER RETROGRADE TEE ✦
For the cosmic overthinkers, philosophical spirallers, and people who have recently discovered that maybe the problem isn't the universe — maybe it's their entire belief system.
The Jupiter Retrograde Tee is for the truth-seekers, perpetual students, spiritual skeptics, and people who have questioned everything they believe at least three times this week. Growth is supposed to be expansive, right? So why does it feel like the universe has assigned you a mandatory internal audit?
Featuring the Cosmically Annoyed witch, Jupiterian introspection, and the uncomfortable realization that sometimes the biggest expansion happens when you stop looking for answers outside yourself.
Wear it when you're questioning everything.
Wear it when your personal philosophy is under reconstruction.
Wear it when someone says "Just trust the process" and you have seventeen follow-up questions.
🌙 PRE-ORDER / LIMITED DROP
This shirt is available by pre-order until 11:59pm ET November 23, 2026 and will be sent to print November 24, 2026. Your shirt is then produced and shipped once the print run is complete.
That means we don't mass-produce piles of shirts that nobody asked for. Each drop is made based on actual orders — better for us, better for resources, and a little more special for you.
This design is part of the Cosmically Annoyed collection and may move into the Vault after its current preorder period. Future rereleases are not guaranteed.
Size Chart in the photos.
Designed, printed, and fulfilled in Canada.
✦ THE TEE
100% ring-spun cotton for a soft, lightweight feel (fabric composition varies by colour)
Tubular knit construction with no side seams for a smooth, comfortable fit
Ribbed knit collar with shoulder taping to help maintain shape
DTG printing on the body for crisp, durable colour
DTF printing available for sleeves and neck labels where applicable
OEKO-TEX® certified, ethically sourced cotton
Meets EU safety standards
2-year EU warranty
🧺 CARE
Keep your cosmic philosopher looking good:
Machine wash cold, max 30°C / 90°F
Wash with similar colours
Tumble dry on low heat
Iron, steam, or dry on low heat
Do not bleach
Do not dry clean
✨ COSMICALLY ANNOYED
Astrology. Attitude. Cosmic Chaos.
Made for people who know their birth chart, question their assumptions, and understand that sometimes the universe doesn't need to give you a sign — it needs you to rethink the entire question.
✦ JUPITER RETROGRADE TEE ✦
For the cosmic overthinkers, philosophical spirallers, and people who have recently discovered that maybe the problem isn't the universe — maybe it's their entire belief system.
The Jupiter Retrograde Tee is for the truth-seekers, perpetual students, spiritual skeptics, and people who have questioned everything they believe at least three times this week. Growth is supposed to be expansive, right? So why does it feel like the universe has assigned you a mandatory internal audit?
Featuring the Cosmically Annoyed witch, Jupiterian introspection, and the uncomfortable realization that sometimes the biggest expansion happens when you stop looking for answers outside yourself.
Wear it when you're questioning everything.
Wear it when your personal philosophy is under reconstruction.
Wear it when someone says "Just trust the process" and you have seventeen follow-up questions.
🌙 PRE-ORDER / LIMITED DROP
This shirt is available by pre-order until 11:59pm ET November 23, 2026 and will be sent to print November 24, 2026. Your shirt is then produced and shipped once the print run is complete.
That means we don't mass-produce piles of shirts that nobody asked for. Each drop is made based on actual orders — better for us, better for resources, and a little more special for you.
This design is part of the Cosmically Annoyed collection and may move into the Vault after its current preorder period. Future rereleases are not guaranteed.
Size Chart in the photos.
Designed, printed, and fulfilled in Canada.
✦ THE TEE
100% ring-spun cotton for a soft, lightweight feel (fabric composition varies by colour)
Tubular knit construction with no side seams for a smooth, comfortable fit
Ribbed knit collar with shoulder taping to help maintain shape
DTG printing on the body for crisp, durable colour
DTF printing available for sleeves and neck labels where applicable
OEKO-TEX® certified, ethically sourced cotton
Meets EU safety standards
2-year EU warranty
🧺 CARE
Keep your cosmic philosopher looking good:
Machine wash cold, max 30°C / 90°F
Wash with similar colours
Tumble dry on low heat
Iron, steam, or dry on low heat
Do not bleach
Do not dry clean
✨ COSMICALLY ANNOYED
Astrology. Attitude. Cosmic Chaos.
Made for people who know their birth chart, question their assumptions, and understand that sometimes the universe doesn't need to give you a sign — it needs you to rethink the entire question.
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